Monday, 4 July 2011

Librarianship and Your Love Life

Many librarians will find themselves working with others. A librarian does not exist in a vacuum; if they did, it would simply be called OCD and you would have a marvelous supply of books at your disposal upon which you could avail your meticulous organizational skills. The fact is, librarians work with people: the public, budding young scholars, professors, medical personnel, business folk, lawyers… you get the point. And all this face time equals a lot of opportunity to meet the man or woman of your dreams. Perhaps you have a patron that, despite their obvious book-finding savvy, always seems to need your help finding just the right book. Maybe you have an avid reader that hungers after your book recommendations. Or maybe you have an amiable yet nervous patron that steals furtive glances at you from atop their book. It's possible you have a whole host of admirers.

The kinds of people you meet in library are sometimes a little more well-read, a little more interesting, and a little less alcoholic than those you meet in a bar. The lights are bright (to enable easy reading) which means you also get to actually see the person you’re talking to – they’re not just a drunken blur in a dimly lit club. Besides, who doesn’t love a book lover? Not only do you have an instant talking point, but according to the Alberta School Library Council (and common sense), “People who read are better spellers, readers and writers; use a broader vocabulary; have a better time in life; and have the potential for greater opportunities for advanced education.”

And the attraction goes both ways; the sexy librarian trope exists for a reason. To put it succinctly, librarians are hot. Think about it. All day you lord over books, and you maintain the peace within the library sphere. You know the meaning of those little numbers and letters on the spines. You are omniscient and powerful within your realm. If that’s not appealing, I don’t know what is. (XKCD points out additional advantages.)

But if for some reason you’re not oozing sex appeal, you have the opportunity to judge the selections of your patron and tear down their self-esteem to the point that they would date a doorknob if it asked nicely (demonstrated below).

Slightly more conventional methods of acquiring library dates involve organizing a night of library-style speed dating in which people bring their favourite book (points to whomever brings the Kama Sutra) and hope to hit it off with a fellow bibliophile.

However, if you entered the library world with the mistaken notion that you would be able to avoid interacting with people in a safe haven of books, first, what were you thinking? And second, do not despair! There’s more than one way to skin a cat. If your social skills are somehow abysmal enough that they would impede any normal face-to-face interaction, just pull a Penelope Trunk and create a blog so that you can marry your internet stalker. Kidding! (Ok, but it is a cute story…) In addition, there are a lot of online dating websites geared towards the literary. I would link you, but I’m unable to support something that pretentious. Besides, I already have my blog to satisfy my online interactions. E-mail if you like long walks on the beach and bestsellers.

Already in love with a librarian? Enjoy this completely adorkable poem, and make sure to deck yourself out in this librarian-lovin' swag so you can proudly display your affection.

Thanks to photobucket for the top photo.